Recovery on the Road

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hi, my name is Rachel. I'm a food addict and compulsive eater. Let's begin with a serenity prayer. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. The topic of this workshop is road to recovery. Other way around, recovery on the road. Okay, my name is Rachel and I'm a food addict. And I'm seated with Debbie. And we are the co leaders for this meeting. So each of us will have up to 20 minutes to speak and then we'll open the room for shares. Up to three minutes. Could someone volunteer to be the timekeeper for this hour? Anyone? [00:01:02] Speaker B: Thank you. [00:01:03] Speaker A: Thank you. Okay, so as I said, I'm Rachel, I'm a food addict and I sent my pictures around. I'm from Boston or from Brookline, and I have been abstinent for 19 years and 11 months. I am 96 pounds lighter than I was when I started. And gosh, what can I say? I just. This program really saved me. I come from a family of food addicts. My mother is right now dying from this disease. My father died 14 years ago. And anyway, so I'm actually really happy that we're here on like a happy topic because I went to the grief one a little a while ago and that was really heavy. So this is just a happy topic. I, unlike my co leader here, I didn't bring any notes or repair. I volunteered for this topic. Not because I travel that much, but I do have a lot of experience. I have experience going to restaurants and going to, you know, family events and all kinds of things. And I do have some experience with traveling over the years. So recently I went on a two week vacation with my husband to. We're Beatle scholars. And we went on a trip with these, you know, well renowned Beatles scholars and a group of 40 people. And we went to Liverpool, London and New York City. So and because it was a group trip, we. Not all of our meals were provided, but a lot of them were. And they sent us menus ahead of time for us to pick what we wanted, which was great. So I looked at it, you know, and a lot. Most of the meals were three courses. And I looked through it and then I went over it with my sponsor and I took a pencil and we figured out, you know, what it was that I could eat. And sometimes it was weird, you know, sometimes I would have, there are lots of times actually when I would just have like when everybody else, it was their appetizer and that was my meal. You know, a lot of times it was that way or. And I wouldn't have the main course. There was one meal where I might have had an appetizer and there was fruit salad for dessert. So I was able to get enough vegetables that way, enough producing me that way. But I also, I prepared myself. So these are. So right now I'm talking about the food plan tool. So I just, I just wanted to share what I bring with me when. So it was on this trip that I'm just talking about. We had a death in the family two months ago and we went there and we were spending a lot of time with family and I brought food and it's a good thing that I did because this was like a big Italian family and people were bringing tons of food and mainly desserts and carbs. There was like nothing. I think once somebody brought a fruit salad finally. But anyway, so. Oh, and I should also say I have it with me, but that I have been free from. So I don't eat sugar or flour. And so what that means is at restaurants I have to be careful with sauces. A lot of sauces have sugar or they have like a cornstarch thickener, which I, I don't eat either. So like plain things are fine with me. Or grilled. And I weigh and measure almost all of the time. So I have a little fold up scale that's in my bag that I bring with me. And when I've gone on big trips, I even bring two scales. And it was good that I did because when we went on the this trip to England, I left one of my scales in a restaurant. But no problem, I had my backup scale. So in addition to bringing batteries, I actually a lot of times bring two scales. So there was a workshop earlier, it was about like the food plan to freedom or something. And so I just want to say a little bit of. Just when I'm talking about weighing and measuring, it may sound obsessive, but to me it frees me from obsession because I am a restrictor and a binger. And I will, when I'm not weighing and measuring, I'll constantly be like, was it too much? [00:06:53] Speaker B: Was it too little? [00:06:54] Speaker A: So anyway, enough about that. So I do want to just give the practical tips of what I bring with me. So. And I bring with me certain things that I don't normally eat. Like they're abstinent, but I don't. So little cans of V8 juice. I don't normally use that as a vegetable, but it was a good thing in England. There were meals where, you know, the vegetable was like a lettuce leaf and 2 tablespoons of chopped up beets or something. So there were a couple times when I'd go back to my room and just drink a couple of cans of V8 juice just to make sure I was full enough. So I bring grape tomatoes, baby carrots. I always bring nuts weighed and measured into little bags and I bring cheese sticks a lot to here. Yesterday I just had like a little baggie of chopped up turkey. And what else was I going to say about what? Yeah, and like raisins. I don't normally eat raisins at all. But that helped me when I was abroad because I wasn't going to pack a bunch of apples in my suitcase. So anyway, so that's just what I have to share about just practical tips. Oh, and I bring, a lot of times I bring like a little tiny Tupperware with salad dressing because salad dressings, a lot of them have sugar. I mean, I've learned the creamier dressings are usually safer. The vinaigrettes tend to have more sugar, that type of thing. So. But, and I also just want to talk about. So that's enough about the food. I just want to talk about. [00:08:44] Speaker C: A. [00:08:44] Speaker A: Little bit about what I do for my program. So I came in from. I was in another 12 step fellowship for 10 years before I was in this one. And so I learned to ahead of time. And this was starting 30 years ago, so it was before we had like all meeting listings were on the Internet. So I would prepare ahead of time when I would find out where there would be meetings near to where I'd be going so that I could, you know, attend meetings. And so this is especially important when I'm with family. So we used to vacation for a week with my mom on the Cape every year. And believe me, I needed a meeting when I was traveling with my mom because I usually needed a vacation after I got back from that. So I. So there was like a meeting that I would go meetings that I found that I would just go to every year. And there were some times where I would actually call the contact person. I would call the contact person and ask if I could speak because if I knew I was speaking, that would definitely ensure that I was going to go. I wasn't going to not go if they were counting on me to speak. So certainly now. And so then I already had learned how to do that and I would do it. So I've been doing that with OA as well. And of course, you know, what's one of the silver linings of the pandemic is zoom. So I don't, I prefer in person meetings, but Zoom, you know, it's a fabulous tool and certainly it's, it, you know, allowed me to keep my absence, you know, during the pandemic when nobody was getting to meetings. And now there aren't as many OA meetings as there are in some other fellowships. So if I can't get to a meeting, it's actually allowed me to go to a larger variety of meetings. And so it's especially useful when I travel. So when I, when I'm on vacation, especially like within the same time zone or whatever, I can actually get to my regular meetings now because I just zoom in. So that is very useful. And I've actually, I've had wonderful experiences going to meetings in other parts of the world, in other parts of this country and I like picked up sponsees that way as well. So. Okay, ten minutes left now. Good. I don't even think I'm going to speak for the full 10 minutes left. But so other things like tool wise. So I pretty much, I have literature loaded on my Kindle. But I also, a lot of times, like especially with a big book, I like to see the book so I can have page numbers. I have a little pocket sized version. So I can't say I've done a lot of my step work while I'm traveling, but I certainly will be reading literature every day and also being able to call or text people, you know, now with cell phones and everything, it's made it easier. I know that shows my age because 30 years ago we didn't have cell phones. But you know, it does make it easier. So when I was in London, of course, so everybody else, you know, got, there were like sandwiches or whatever and I got them to like bring me a salad. So they brought me a salad and somebody wanted to share it. And of course, like for me, like, I don't know if they meant for that salad to be the more than one person, but you know, they may have thought that salad would feed eight people, but it just like would barely give me enough vegetables. So anyway, so there was this woman and she was like a maniac about it. And so I said no. I had, I said no, that I wasn't going to share it. And afterwards we ended up, I mean she didn't know it was amends. But for me, you know, I just was like, I'm really sorry that I couldn't share my salad, but she was. Anyway, it was not. It's crazy, but it just wasn't an easy situation for me because I'm a people pleaser. So, anyway, I texted my sponsor from London. I don't know what time it was, but I was just like, am I wrong for not sharing my salad with this person? And she was like, you know, no. And, you know, I realized that, you know, it was okay. But. So anyway, that's just an example of how, you know, wherever you are in the world. Well, maybe not wherever, but a lot of times you can still, you know, if you can't call your sponsor, if it's. You can text your sponsor. So the telephone has been really useful, you know, And I will admit that I am not one of the best people at using all the tools every single day. But certainly when I'm traveling, I do find the literature particularly helpful. So I guess I just want to say that it's for anybody who's new, you can actually do anything. You can go to weddings. And I used to worry about weighing and measuring in front of people. And you know what? People are more concerned with their own food. They are not. Like. And sometimes, like, if people see me, they're like, oh, I really admire what you're doing. Like, I, you know, would get a lot of that. I don't like it when they're like, sometimes I'll get, oh, you're so good. Like, I don't like that at all. But anyway, I'm rambling a little, but, yeah. So some other examples of what I've been able to do. So my husband and I, for a few years, we went on cruises. People are like, oh, my God, like, the chocolate buffets, like, how do you do it? I'm like, it actually is pretty easy. Especially, like, within the past 10 years, there's more of an awareness of food allergies. And so it's just. Anyway, on the cruises, it was pretty easy because a lot of times, you know, the menu will be, like, ahead of time. They would. So I went. I know after hearing about vacationing with my mom on the Cape, you will probably not believe that I actually shared a cabin with her on a cruise in, actually, Ukraine. We went 10 years ago. It was kind of a finding your roots kind of thing for us because I have relatives who emigrated from there, my mom's parents. But anyway, even, like, in Ukraine, I found it easy to stay abstinent. But they would tell me ahead of time. I would tell them what I couldn't eat. And they'd be like, okay, so you'll be able to eat this. You'll be able to this. And there was fresh produce, and it really was not a hard time. And also, on a lot of cruises, there are Friends of Bill meetings. And usually when I go to these, it works as an umbrella for all 12 step programs. So people know Friends of Bill. So maybe it's mostly alcoholics, but yeah, there was one year in particular where there was another food act who was struggling. And we all know that helping others is, for me anyway, it's what really keeps me abstinent. And I was able to help her, so that was really useful. So, yeah. So going to those meetings on the crew, on the cruises, you know, keeping active, that. Yeah. So can I say, I just. I think that once I hit bottom. [00:18:06] Speaker D: I. [00:18:06] Speaker A: You know, if you have the gift of desperation and you're really honestly doing, you know, able to take step one, that for me was the hardest thing once I reached that point. Up until then, I was in and out. I would be trying not to eat when I was traveling. But, you know, but once I had that gift of desperation, you know, it's just a matter of planning and bringing my tools with me. And, yeah, and this is this, like, stupid cliche, but it's really true. You know, fail to plan, plan to fail. And that's just, you know, it's just a little matter of planning. Menus are on the Internet a lot now. Actually. All restaurants have menus on the Internet, but that's not necessarily traveling. But anyway, so I think that's all I've got. And looking forward to hearing my co leader. And all of you. [00:19:23] Speaker C: Hi. [00:19:24] Speaker B: Debbie Gray from Compulsive Overeater. I'll get there in a minute. I don't need the mic. I really don't know who this is. I don't know who that person is anymore. Hi. I'm so glad to be here today. New York City. Born, raised, worked. I think I live the furthest outside of New York City. Now I live in Lynbrook. For a couple of years, I lived in Tuckahoe, so that's the furthest I've lived outside of New York City. I was born without a full button. I never knew what it felt like to be full. To this day, anxiety and hunger feel the same to me. So if I don't have a food plan that I follow, I'm dead, Literally. And I'll tell you why. This program saved my life. I came in in January of 2005. I reached by 2006. Eighteen months later, I reached a healthy body weight. And in 2012, because I went for a well checkup, because if we're overweight, we don't want to go for well checkups because that's all we want to hear. Doctors say, does your sugar is high, cholesterol is high. You'd be so much. I weighed the right thing. And she said, I just don't like this. It turned out I had a tumor in my kidney and I had to lose a kidney. Had I not gone it was cancer, I would not be here. And of all the things I've given up, alcohol is the least my problems. Because with one kidney, I have to be. And there's no bungee jumping or pro football, but that's good. I was fortunate to retire after working for the New York City board of vet. And I raised my son as a single parent. And then I discovered the wonderful world of traveling. And I have found, like Rachel said, it's really not difficult. I heard it said another way, proper prior planning prevents poor performance. I do the same thing when I'm traveling as I do when I'm home. All my books are on my phone. I get up. The first thing I do in the morning is I read my books. I may have to go to the bathroom first, but then I come back and I read my books. I say my prayers, I commit what I'm going to eat today. And then they also commit today. For this day and this day only, I will be abstinent. If today sucks so bad, all bets are off tomorrow. I have only found one day in all of these years that I said that tomorrow was gonna. And God sends somebody to my house that night and said, I don't really feel like driving home. Can I sleep over? So what do I say? No. And what am I gonna do? Because I'm hurting doesn't mean I have to hurt myself. So God puts people in my way to keep me from being more stupid than I can be. Let's just put it that way. So once I started retiring, I like to go on trips. Oh, nobody cooks less than I do. I have a stove because it comes with the apartment. And I eat a healthy, balanced meal because I go to a nutritionist. One more thing. About a year ago, I went for my physical. I shrunk a whole inch, and I put on five pounds. And that was abominable for me because, you know, five could lead to seven to ten. So I went back to my nutritionist, and she said, of course you're 18 years older than when you started. Now your body's not the same, you're not doing the same. So we changed my food plan and I lost 12 pounds. I have never weighed this. In high school I weighed this for 30 seconds cuz we know it happens, you lose it. So. And that's the whole thing. I always thought when I got to this weight, my life would be perfect. When I got to this number, Mr. Wright would drive up in a right white Corvette. I would win the billion dollar mega. Nah, I'm always going to have problems. But I have a different set of strategies, skills and structure that helped me and I have found that, God bless me, that I am able to travel. I live within my means and I'm able to travel. As Rachel said, there's every restaurant today has a menu online, so there are no surprises. If I know I'm going, I look up the menu. In addition to breaking out, in fact, when I eat the wrong foods, I have developed a number of sensitivities. I have Barrett's, which is acid reflux's big brother. So there's a lot of things that are off. I can't eat citrus fruits, I can't eat spicy foods, I can't eat things like that. I am highly allergic to msg. Been there, done that. And so I throw that into wherever I go. I tell them I'm very high maintenance, but I'm pleasant and I tip really well. So when I go on the cruises, every cruise line has their menu. When I first started doing this, I would take copy 9 pages of menus and bring it to my nutritionist and. [00:25:09] Speaker D: She would say you could have this. [00:25:11] Speaker B: You could have this. Because they give them fancy names and basically the more adjectives you, the more adjectives you have before food that's just added stuff. Crusted planko, deep fry, you know, whatever it is just means it's that with more stuff on it. So I will always order it plain. I don't do fried foods. That's just me. Bread, flour, sugar. That's not my stuff. I can't eat nuts. That's my thing. There are not enough nuts in this world that will make me happy. And I found that out because one time I went on a diet and the diet said you could have 16 nuts, you could have 16 nuts in a serving. So, so I had 16 nuts at 9:00, I had 16 nuts at 9:30, I had 16 nuts at 10. By the time I knew it, the can was empty. So I just, I stay away. That's an allergic food for me because I break out and crazy. In fact, I pray I commit to the day. Then I get up and I bring with me whatever's necessary. I knew because I looked at the website that we were having bread. Breakfast and dinner are served and every room had a mini fridge. I didn't want to. I don't want to go out. I didn't want to go out. So I brought lunches for myself. I brought some, you know, snacky things for myself. So there's not a problem. I can't complain that I didn't have enough to eat or I didn't get the right foods because I planned in advance. When I go a buffet means serve yourself. Buffet does not mean all you can eat. Everything you hear, I will hear, I have repeated from somewhere else. I didn't come up with this stuff for myself. So when I go places and I'll say to them, I'm not allowed to have this. And they're very. They're places. I took a train trip across the Canadian Rockies last July. And they asked you what you need and what you want. And I said to them, I can't eat this, I can't eat that. I can't eat this. And they said, okay, One time they made a mistake. I said, I'm really sorry and they don't want you getting sick. The last thing you could do is they want you getting sick. So I have learned to say I'm really very sorry, but this, I can't eat this. It has nuts. I'm really very sorry, I can't eat this. But most places are very amenable. When I go on the cruise, I tell them I need to sit at the same table every night so I don't have to keep explaining to the waiter what I need. I said, you could give me two salads in one bowl or you want to give me two separate salads. Whatever you want. I said, but this is what I need. And they are very gracious about it because their job is to make you happy. When I go on an airplane, I see what they're serving first because it's all processed. Airplane food is all processed. And other than yogurts and liquids, you could pretty much take whatever you want on a plane in a little plastic container. Salad with a piece of chicken, whatever you want. A sandwich, you can take this stuff with you. On an airplane you have to still go through. But liquids and mushy stuff, they don't let you take. Yeah, okay. I like to travel, so I plan I do a lot of service. This is my first one today because I've been doing a lot of service. Service keeps me abstinent. Service keeps me because the most. I would never want to have to give up a service position because I wasn't abstinent. That would make me crazy. I would be disappointing myself. So when people say that no matter what, I love that. And I only have to do it for today, for this 24 hours. And actually it's less because I sleep for eight. [00:29:32] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:29:34] Speaker B: And. And this. And life is what goes on between meals. And once I have my food committed that just freeze. I don't have to worry once I am free from the obsession of can I have this? What should I have? What should I have next? I plant life goes on. This has been a wonderful convention because I didn't have to worry about my breakfast, my lunch, my dinner or anything else. I want to go to bed tonight. Being happy with myself. Do I make mistakes with people? Yeah. Sometimes I say the wrong thing. Yesterday I said something was very pretentious and I had to apologize to that person. And I said, I'm really very sorry. That was, that was. She was like I said, no, I should not have said that. Whether she realized it or not, that was something I should not have said because I should know better. And should is a very judgmental word. I can't tell anybody else what to do. I have no power over peaceful places, things or situations. I have no power over my own body, which really annoys the crap out of me because even though I do the right thing, sometimes my body reacts badly. But by doing the best that I can do today with what I. With this, with what I have to work with, I find that I am successful. I go to meetings like Rachel said. I've been to a meeting in Anchorage, Alaska. I've been to a meeting in New Orleans. I've been to meetings in California. I've been to meetings. Oh, in 2010, WSBC World Service was in California and my friend and I looked up and we went to a meeting in somebody's house in Laurel Hill Canyon. And she was a shut in and she was like, why are you calling? I said, you have on the meeting list. So me and my friend and two other ladies were there and we had a meeting and somebody's. You never know what you're going to walk into when you go to a meeting. We all speak the same language, different accent. This is the only place that I can go where people will applaud because I didn't eat off the floor. I didn't eat it frozen. I didn't use the expiration date as a suggestion. I didn't eat off kids plates. You understand this. So I only hope that maybe some of the tips that we have been giving you make a difference and you can go and not be afraid to travel. The world opens up for you when you're abstinent. The world opens up for you when you're willing to say this is how. It's not a diet. This is a plan you're going to follow for the rest of your life. And you have to be comfortable with it. Because if you're not comfortable and you feel restricted, then one day you're just going to go nuts. And I've seen too many people do that. Open 40 cans of. 40 packets of sweet and Low. But I'm just saying when you feel denied. So you have to find a food plan that fits your life, that fits. Some people love to cook. That's fine. [00:33:00] Speaker A: Not my thing. [00:33:03] Speaker B: All the no's in the world doesn't mean I don't prepare salads for myself. Doesn't mean I don't get things for myself. But as little as possible doesn't mean. But I need to take care of myself. And part of that is my love for traveling. We couldn't travel for the last three years. Now that we're all back, I'm out again. Now that we're all in person, I'm out again. And whatever's on your plate is none of my business. Do I like to look? [00:33:37] Speaker D: Sure. [00:33:40] Speaker B: It's your plate, not mine. I have what I can eat, you have what you could eat. And as long as we each stay, you know, stay in your own lane doesn't mean, like I said, doesn't mean I stopped looking. Do I lust? Lusting is okay. Lusting doesn't mean you've done. And my biggest thing is if somebody good looking walks by, you're not going to grab their ass that's not yours. You may have yours to grab a significant others but you're not taking. It's the same thing with food. You have your food, they have their food. And once I learned this, my life became a lot easier. Once I learned that I will always have problems in life. But I have a strong support system. I have a great sponsor, I have prep time, I prepare, then I can go anywhere and do. I can't do everything I told you bungee jumping is out. What I can do for me within my little sphere of world, I hope what We've said has made helped some of you. So you're not afraid to go out. You're not afraid to see the world and live your life between meals. If so, I'm going to be finished now. If you would like to share, the recording devices are here. I step back from the mic because I happen to be loud, but you could get closer if you like. If you would like to share, please come to the front of the room. We remind you that this session is being recorded and your sharing demonstrates your consent to being recorded. If you wish to remain anonymous, please use a fictitious name or choose. You don't even have to give a name. Hi, I'm here. Please say where you are from, how long you have been in oa, but devote your share to the OA experience on this topic, which is recovery on the road. The meeting is now open for sharing. [00:35:57] Speaker E: Hi, I'm Bobbi, a food addict. And thank you both, ladies. Actually, it's given me a lot of hope for when I can finally go traveling overseas or away. But I have gone on vacations, I have traveled different places and I too look ahead. So if I'm going with a friends of mine over a weekend and it's a birthday thing and they want to go to a certain restaurant, I have credibility now because I've been doing this 23 years and one day at a time. And my friends will say, look on the menu and see if you. Here's a few places. Look on the menu and see where you can go and what you can eat. My friends, you know, sometimes they forget, you know, and, you know, I just make the best of it. But I have, like I said, credibility. So I'll look at the menus, see what I can eat, and most of the time I can find something I can eat. You know, I went once with a friend of mine to a restaurant. We got there, it was a restaurant week or something. And so it was those price fix things. I said, I can't eat sugar and flour. The chef came out, the owner of the restaurant, the chef, he came out, sat with me and we talked about what was on there and what he could do. And I did. So I'm not gonna eat dessert because I don't eat sugar and flour. So I did two salads, you know, and I did a meal and it was fine. I've been many places where this. I've been a place once where I said, I can't have gluten, you know, I don't eat sugar, flour. And we were about. I was with somebody else who also doesn't eat gluten. And we were about to sit down to eat, and the chef, one of the chefs came running out of the kitchen and said, don't eat whatever it was because there was flour in. In it, and we didn't know it. So I didn't say that. I'm, you know, whatever. [00:37:51] Speaker B: I said, thank you. [00:37:53] Speaker E: And so they don't want. As Debbie said, they don't want you to get sick. They don't want us, you know. And so, for example, coming down here even, or recently, I went to Region 6. And, you know, I bring my breakfast with me. I bring my. You know, I happen to love my breakfast, so I bring that with me. I did bring my lunch. Luckily, I had two separate things with me, and my refrigerator froze part of one of mine. There was no microwave, so I couldn't do the other part of mine. But I had enough that I could eat what I'm supposed to eat. And there's another meal. My sponsor always says to me, there's another meal coming. And I've been places where I've had to kind of put something together. And I say to myself, I have to say this because I'm a food addict, and I can get myself. My feathers get ruffled. I have to say, there's another food come. Another meal coming. Bobby, you're not going to die. I'm not going. You know, life will go on. And I've gone a lot of places. I've gone on vacation and brought all my breakfasts with me. I've gone on. You know, I'll go out too, you know, but I don't need to go out too much because that's where I can get myself in a little trouble. So I just have to be careful what I do. And so thank you. I think my time is up and I'm looking forward to. I've always wanted to go to Ireland. This is my dream. So I'm hoping maybe. Maybe next year, you know, I can go during summer vacation. Thanks. [00:39:24] Speaker C: Hi. Hi, everyone. I'm Elizabeth, a food addict, compulsive reader. Thank you so much, ladies, for sharing. I identify with both of you. I realize as you were talking, how much, how far I've come with the food and all. Just like with working the steps in the beginning, I didn't know exactly how to get them right, but I made them my own with the help of my sponsor, of course, so that I'm a spiritual person. I work the steps in every area of my life, including the food Plan. And I have a food plan today that I love my food. I'm not deprived. I carry my food with me. All people are sharing. I take my breakfast. I drink almond milk. I take it with me because I like to get coffee sometimes. And I always have my own because I don't do dairy. I try not to do meat for my cholesterol. And I'm very happy with my plan. I love it. I can go any restaurant. I look them up all the time and see what I'm eating, when I'm going to eat. I remember when I was working and I was weighing and measuring all the time. This is my program at the time, in business meetings, I had to eat every three hours. Hypoglycemic. And I made a presentation and my beetle would go off and have to eat my snack. But all I simply said was, forgive me. I'm on a nutritionist food plan, and for my health, I have to eat every three hours. [00:40:46] Speaker A: Marvel it. [00:40:47] Speaker C: Go like somebody. You said nobody cares what you're doing. They really don't care what you're putting into your mouth. I'd be at a luncheon at a business luncheon to 10 people. I have my scale. I'm weighing my fish or the chicken. They look at me and I say, I'm on a nutritionist food plan, and I must weigh and measure my food for my health. You're so good. [00:41:07] Speaker A: Wow. [00:41:08] Speaker C: Are you terrific. I know my truth. I'm a food addict, and I had to do this for my life. And I didn't. I didn't. I realized nobody cares what's going into your. You know, Nobody. The ego went out the window. My sponsor said, you want to live or you want to recover? I said, I want to recover. And even today in my life, I'd go to classes. I do service. I carry my food with me. I pack my lunch, carry my almond milk, whatever it may be. Not always. Perfectly. Sometimes I have a little yen for something I do have. My little Larabar that I do. But I'm okay. I'm not the kind of person that if I go off the plant for a second sometimes, I'm not going to go out and gain £50 and just never come back. I'm around too long. I'm around over 30 years. I know the game. I know my truth. I found out who I was by working the steps, and this is where I belong. I don't talk about the program or the food plant to straight people. They just don't understand. They may love you. They may Care about you, my family. I don't explain it. Explain to death people pleasing, explaining and exhausting me what am I doing? And they still don't get it. Like, for example, did you enjoy the binge before the old days? Enjoy the binge. I feel my heart was ripped. I'm out of time. You got what I'm trying to say. And thank you so much. Thank you, ladies, for your service. Appreciate it. [00:42:40] Speaker E: Thank you. [00:42:47] Speaker D: Hi, I'm Vashti. I'm a compulsive overeater. I have to tell you, when I saw this meeting was listed, when I checked in last night, you know, recovery on the road, that has been my biggest challenge. And literally, recovery on the road, it means like driving from New York City. I think Vasa College is probably 65 miles away or something from my home. Wrote, you know, recovery on the road, driving to get to my daughter's school. You know, I'd be eating, eating, eating, because just being anxious and uncomfortable. So. And our place upstate, driving today. I always had my stash. Going to my daughter's colleges, always had my stash. An airplane, Europe, come back with all that chocolate because I. Oh, food. I'd be eating from there. So I always try to wonder, why is this so difficult? Other than the usual difficulty, it's just being anxious and not having control. And as a food addiction, you know, we are control freaks. I think that's why I'm a teacher, because I am the God of the classroom, you know, the single mother. I am the goddess. So it's always control and everything. I do seem to. I was the one in charge. So, you know, being out of control and time passing and not knowing what to do with myself, I realize I'm a really anxious person, you know, of the unknown. P.S. well, my daughter's graduated from college. I have no business eating, going up to college or not. And I've been abstinent for a bit for a while now. But this abstinence came. I did have some uncomfortable food issues during the summer, but I've been absent for a while. I've been gall weight for many, many years right now. And I'm thinking, well, a lot of the road eating was because I wasn't working the steps the way I should. And with the last seven years, you know, I have really been working the steps. And I. You know, when you come into the program, you'd hear these old timers say, it's not what you're eating, it's what's eating you. And you wonder, what the hell are they talking about, you know, just get me thin and out of here, you know. So I realized with the steps, it was really all this emotional stuff that I ate to cover, like the need to be in control. The need, you know, to be this person where nobody can tell me what to do or not. I have to say, this Christmas, last Christmas, I turned 60 for Christmas. And my eldest daughter, who's solo maintenance, we went to Paris together. And I was. I had fun with the food, you know, it was no issue. And I just got involved with the culture, you know, and I ate things that was not normally in my food plan, but I didn't binge. It wasn't about the food. It was just enjoying my elder daughter company and enjoying this experience. And I'll wrap up, but I have to tell you, I think you guys have given me the confidence, maybe. My mom is old, she's not very mobile, and she's dying to go on a cruise. And I just wouldn't go with her. And, you know, she has four sons. I'm the only daughter, and she wants to go with me, which is an honor. She just wants to be with me. And I may just do it for like a three day or something. So I'm so happy I walked into this meeting and I thank you ladies. [00:46:26] Speaker C: Thank you. [00:46:41] Speaker F: Hi, I'm Gina Compulsive overeater. [00:46:43] Speaker C: Hi. [00:46:44] Speaker F: I'm from Syracuse. So one thing I have found is it's much more difficult for me when I'm traveling in the US than when I'm on a cruise, especially or traveling in the Caribbean. I just think because the portions are just so crazy for us here, that even the weighing and measuring, which is I had not thought of bringing a scale that makes so much sense now that I have heard that. But I didn't even know that they made them that small. But for the cruising, I will say one thing that you can do is that I do is you talk to the maitre when you first get on the boat. They will work with you for anything you have, whether it's no flour, no sugar, anything at all. The other thing I do is half portions. So whatever it is, except for my salad, I always ask for half portions. And that has really helped me to get through the challenges on there. And they couldn't believe it. My waiters were fantastic on my last one and they kept saying, did go up to the buffet? Did you go to the buffet? No, where is it? So I didn't even know where it was. And I never made it to that area. And they just, they could not believe that. Especially because I'm still large. But I'm working on it. But that's one thing I was. When I. Last night we had not planned dinner as well as we should have. So we went over and I just started asking the waiter, what are the options? And there's always options. That's the thing, you know. So they put lettuce around the turkey instead. It just makes so much sense. I didn't think of that. So they always want to work with you. That's the one confidence that I have now. [00:48:30] Speaker B: So. [00:48:31] Speaker F: Thank you. [00:48:37] Speaker B: Got a few more minutes? Yeah. [00:48:54] Speaker A: I get this on Amazon, by the way. I think it's like maybe $25. Yeah. See, it just takes batteries. Yeah. [00:49:08] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:49:11] Speaker B: Can I say something? [00:49:12] Speaker A: This isn't a share. [00:49:13] Speaker G: But you said you wanted to go to Ireland. I went to Ireland. On Aer Lingus, you can go online and order in advance, like a gluten free meal or something, which I did. Which didn't have any bread and stuff. And that's just Aer Lingus, but I'm sure all the airlines, you can go on in advance and order some kind of special meal that make you. [00:49:33] Speaker B: Thank you. Thank you. If nobody else is going to share, we could end. [00:49:37] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:49:38] Speaker B: Last chance. [00:49:39] Speaker A: Anyone else? [00:49:46] Speaker B: Wrap it up? [00:49:47] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:49:48] Speaker B: Okey doke. That's all the time we have for sharing. Thank you for attending this workshop. This is just a little. Let's close with the Serenity prayer. Deep breath in, Let it out. If nobody told you today they love you, God loves you and so do I. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.